Insensitive....

Can someone please teach me on how to be insensitive?!?!
I just need a HUG!!! ;(

How I wish my heart had an on-off switch. That I could be so strong to walk away from you so I could turn my heart off from the pain.  One of the most hardest things in life when we are forced to make decisions with our head not our heart.  I even dreamt of you last night and how happy we were. Words can’t express the joy and happiness I felt in my dream. Your gentle touch and the warmth I feel at your side just felt so real.  But when I woke up I felt the sadness, realizing that it was just a dream. And it makes me even more sad knowing it will all just be memories.

I have not been lucky in love but I've been blessed with some amazing moments with you. How could I walk away just like that and forget you when all I can think of is how great we did and all the amazing memories we shared. And now,  how I wish I just don't care too much about people in my life.  And Yes, I'm  just so broken right now.  I'm turning to music, as I always do...

"Insensitive"

How do you cool your lips, after a summer's kiss?

How do you rid the sweat, after the body bliss?

How do you turn your eyes, from the romantic glare?

How do you block the sound of a voice

You'd know anywhere?

Oh, I really should've known

By the time you drove me home

By the vagueness in your eyes, your casual goodbyes

By the chill in your embrace

The expression on your face that told me

Maybe you might have some advice to give

On how to be insensitive

Insensitive

Insensitive

How do you numb your skin, after the warmest touch?

How do you slow your blood, after the body rush?

How do you free your soul, after you've found a friend? 

How do you teach your heart it's a crime to fall in love again?

Oh, you probably won't remember me

It's probably ancient history

I'm one of the chosen few

Who went ahead and fell for you

I'm out of vogue, I'm out of touch

I fell too fast, I feel too much

I thought that you might have some advice to give

On how to be insensitive

Oh, I really should've known

By the time you drove me home

By the vagueness in your eyes, your casual goodbyes

By the chill in your embrace

The expression on your face that told me

Maybe you might have some advice to give

On how to be insensitive

When it rains, it pours....

When it rains, it pours...
Oh Lord, please I just need some sunshine.

It's a crazy, crazy and unexplainable time. One minute everything's okay, the next you have nothing.

I just felt like absolutely nothing is going right with my life now, from job that isn't getting any better and now terrible heartaches. I felt so helpless. I'm here, nobody to share my loneliness and sadness. When people get too shattered, all they have to do is drop things, go back to their comfort zone til they're well and ready enough to step out of it again and take the risks.

But seriously though it's hard to let you go. I can't blame anyone except for myself for this heartaches. I knew from the very start that things were complicated but I still choose to stick with you.  How can you hate someone when all he showed to you is nothing but goodness. I just don't know how to start again without you. I just miss everything about you.


27 hours and 4 minutes of zero sleep.
I'm numb. I'm lost.
And now I'm sick literally.

F*cked Up!!!

I am very hopeful that one day I could wear you.
Until this day I just felt hopeless.
 I guess it will never gonna happen.

It's been months since I last posted anything to my own little space. This is  somewhere I am free to dream, to rant about my worst days, to be silly and stupid, to be weak  when everyone expects me to be strong, and express anything my mind could think of, or my heart could feel. 

Have you ever felt like nothing--absolutely nothing--is going right with your life? That's exactly how I feel right now. I was happy. Then I wasn't. This week is just plainly unbelievable. I just can't sleep and I'm in an emotional roller coaster now and I feel such a fool right now to believe that you loved me too. I know I should have been prepared for this but believe it or not, I was ready for this until you said such things that made me feel stupid now. I guess it would be much easier if you haven't said things that made me believe that this would lead to something beautiful. I just don't get it, why just now when I'm so into you and into this relationship.

How many times can I break 'til I shatter. How i wish that all of these is just a bad dream. I'm so broken. Not again. 


Nobody said it was easy
No one ever said that it would be this hard
- "The Scientist" by Coldplay